Saturday, May 9, 2009

Christmas in Springtime

This is what happens when I sleep in (and by "sleeping in" I mean 8:30 am) on the weekends. My husband dresses the girls in their Christmas Eve outfits to go to the park.  Is this some clever scheme to make sure I get up with the girls every weekend morning or is he THAT CLUELESS?  Given the choice, I hope the former as I'd rather have a manipulative husband rather than a downright stupid one.

We are leaving to go to Birmingham, Alabama for a week. When one's annual spring vacation spot changes from St. John in the Virgin Islands to Birmingham, Alabama, one knows one's hit on hard times.  No offense to Courteney Cox who originates from Birmingham. Oh, and my parents and sister who live there... (Of course I'm more concerned with not pissing off Courteney.)

So the girls are napping and I'm packing a "bribe bag" full of stuff they don't normally get to eat for the plane ride. Every time they fuss, I will stick a Gerber Strawberry Yogurt Melt in their mouth. I'm quite certain there's no strawberry or yogurt in this product. I think it's sugar, glue and red dye. My rewarding the girls with food for bad behavior will undoubtedly come back to bite me in the ass when they seek counseling for an eating disorder in their teens and their therapist traces it back to this habit of mine wherein they whine and I shove a graham cracker into their open mouth.  Therapists always blame the mothers... So on that note, here's to making our kids as crazy as we are. HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

I'll write from Alabama, y'all!

PS -- If you're on the Southwest direct flight from Chicago to Birmingham tomorrow, might I suggest you re-book?  Being on our flights is never pleasant.

PSS -- And listen to me rag on Jenny McCarthy here.


  1. Funny, I had a son seeking therapist moment today. Bummer about St. John, but hey it's probably just hot and humid anyway right now.

  2. Those yogurt melts gross me out. Sarah loves them, but Matty is with me.

    Good luck to the other passengers on your flight tomorrow! I'd wish you good luck, but I have flown with my kids and I know it's just not worth it.

    Happy Alabama-cation!

  3. I've never bought the yogurt melts, but my niece is addicted to them. I'll have to try them next time I have to bribe the kids to behave (because I am totally not above that). The last time I had to bribe them on a flight was the only time they've had fruit snacks (again, no fruit in these snacks at all). I swear, those things are like baby crack. But I had two really well-behaved kids for a terrible plane ride, a terrible attempt to get a rental car, and a terrible drive. Totally worth it!

    (And the girls are adorable. I can see my husband dressing the kids in Santa outfits to go to the park, then announcing, "It was cold outside.")

  4. I have these same thoughts about my husband on a regular basis. I will have maybe 2 or 3 things in the back of her closet that she has grown out of and I haven't gotten rid of yet and somehow everytime he dresses her these will be the items that he dresses her in so she goes out of the house looking ridiculous!!
    I truly wonder if they consciously do this or if they really are that clueless?

  5. At least your husband dresses your children. Mine just leaves our daughter in the clothes she slept in.