Thursday, January 15, 2009

CBS Gives John Mayer Own Show; CBC Executive Asked to Take Eye Exam

John Mayer might star in a variety show on CBS.  This man will scare small children, not to mention advertisers. One can only hope it airs sometime after 10 pm.  And my goodness, look what being brunette does for Jessica Simpson!  She almost doesn't look like a harlot.  L'Oreal, send her a big box of Burberry Bark or whatever creative name you call this color. Stat!

And speaking of color, allow me to share my favorite John Mayer quote and then let's discuss:

"Life is like a box of crayons.  Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you're really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I've got a few missing. It's okay though, because I've got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem?  I mean there are so few colors of life, of feeling, of articulation ... so when I meet someone who's an 8-color type, I'm like, "Hey girl, magenta!" and she's like "oh, you mean purple!" and she goes off on her purple thing and I'm like, "no, I want magenta!"  -- John Mayer

I think we can learn a few lessons here:

1) John Mayer might be even deeper than Ethan Hawke.
2) Jessica Simpson doesn't have the color magenta in her crayon box, so to speak.
3) John Mayer should refrain from granting interviews.  

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