Monday, September 7, 2009

Deep Thoughts on Labor Day

As I reflect back on summer this Labor Day, I have but one thought: This summer bit the big one. We began the official start of summer with an official visit to the emergency room and double diagnosis of Hand, Foot and Mouth Disease during Memorial Day Weekend. July 4th was celebrated with a rousing rendition of my telling the neighbors to go f#@$ themselves while spewing off faux statistics about children blowing their fingertips off with bottle rockets. And here is it Labor Day and my house looks like Guns N Roses (back before Axl Rose went bald) went on a bender with their friends from Motley Crue (back before Tommy divorced Heather and married Pam several times or whatever their deal is).

Not the best summer. But then I look at the girls, less baby and more little girl, looking all grown up in their turtle and flamingo-themed swimsuits and think, "How can I be pissy?" This summer sort of sucked, but the girls learned to eat with a fork, say "I love you" before bed and occasionally utter the word "shit" which I recently yelled when I spilled Diet Coke on myself while driving my mother's car. My kids are healthy, happy and have a keen ear for profanity. What more could I really ask for?

So I will spend today being grateful for what I have rather than bitching about what is wrong with the world. Like why you can't buy booze in Alabama on Sunday. That's weird. I mean, you can plan ahead and get all liquored up on Sunday if you want but you can't go out to the store and buy more if you need it. I bet this law promotes people actually buying MORE alcohol than they need -- just in case -- and actually drinking heavily on Sunday, because, hey, you've got lots left over from the back-up supply you bought just in case you ran out after midnight on Saturday so why not polish it off on Sunday? So a law that was meant to keep folks sober on Sundays is really promoting crazy ass drunken benders all across the state of Alabama. Just a theory.


  1. The girls are so adorable. Their hair has gotten so blonde...the look like little girls now! A-DOR-ABLE!

    I miss that cute in-between stage.

  2. How old are the girls?

  3. Enjoy the rest of your time in Alabama. I hope your home renovation is completed soon. I wonder if your neighbors were setting off fireworks on Labor Day. Your daughters are adorable. I was hoping you would have purchased some monogrammed rompers. Maybe in a pink and white checkered pattern, or contrasting stripes. Take care.

  4. I live in a dry county. Nothing has ever made me want a glass of wine more. Mama has to stick her toe over the county line and go through the liquor store's drive thru lane (NO MINORS ALLOWED INSIDE) to obtain "the hooch." Then, I listen to the baby holler for french fries all the way home because she doesn't understand that greasy fast food doesn't come out of that particular window. Ohhh, the problems I have!
    Seriously, I'm sorry to hear about the flood damage. Your girls are dolls. Keep up the southern narrative. It is like a fractured version of Lake Wobegone.

  5. I'm sorry the summer sucked so much. Truthfully, I feel like ours sort of got lost under the couch. Between the construction and my general pissiness, it seems like it went by without anything really fun. But at least our house is livable right now.

    Sounds like the girls are doing great, growing up to be dainty swearing little ladies. And you can't buy liquor in Minnesota on Sunday either. I've known people to drive an hour to Wisconsin just for Sunday liquor. That's got to be safe!